Today was beyond shitty. I feel like crap, didn’t think I had enough money for a trip that I’m going on, and find out some more stuff about my so called “Father”. But passed all that, I got enough money for my trip, I’m feeling a little better, and I know in my heart that I will always be there for my half brother and sister. My half brother is a little older to be able to understand what is going on… and plus us girls take this thing a little different. He’s and amazing smart little boy and I love him to death. When it comes to my half sister I get scared. I’m scared she’s going to go through what I did. I’m scared she’s going to hate everything in life for what he did. I’m scared for her. When she is older to understand, I can’t wait to have a full conversation with her and connect with eachother. When I look at her… I see me. Innocent little girl that lost her dad at a young age. But she has something better. She has a bunch of people that love her dearly and an amazing family from what I have gotten to meet. I even thought about writing letters to her. So that when she is older or old enough to understand she can read them or her mom could read them to her. We don’t live that far away from each other, us three sibilings. But its really hard to get us all in one room. All our moms have different lives and so do we. But we will ALWAYS have each other, no matter what.